An elegant bedroom. A four-poster bed is visible from one side. A BUTLER enters carrying a small parcel.

                      BUTLER
          M'lady?

From the other side of the bed comes the screeching, upper-class British voice of DAME PARADIGM-RICTUS-JONES.

                      DAME P-R-J
          Over here!

The Butler rounds the corner of the bed and faces her. We still cannot see her.

                      BUTLER
          Pardon me, m'lady, I could
          not see you.

                      DAME P-R-J
          Of course you couldn't, I've
          fallen off the bed.

                      BUTLER
          Did m'lady forget her costume
          again?

                      DAME P-R-J
               (furious)
          You insolent swine! How dare
          you!

                      BUTLER
          M'lady really must prepare
          for her scenes in future.

                      DAME P-R-J
          Shut up you sod!

                      BUTLER
          Yes, m'lady. There is a
          package for you m'lady.

                      DAME P-R-J
          Throw it to me.

He does so. She tears away the wrapping.

                      BUTLER
          It's from Mr. Flotsam, the
          noted modern artist.

                      DAME P-R-J
               (reading the note)
          "Dear Dame Paradigm-Rictus-
          Jones, I am a progressive
          artist, therefore please
          accept my gift of this
          silver-plated plastic table
          setting."

She holds up, just high enough to see over the bed, a silver knife, fork and spoon. She throws it up over the bed, and it lands with a clatter on the hardwood floor.

                      DAME P-R-J
          Crap modern art!

FADE TO BLACK.